Broken Place
by Crash Hale
Summary: After giving up on men at the age of eighteen, Rosalie meets Jake. Jake is perfect, he even loves her little daughter Mila. Just when she starts to believe things might be okay, family and the past get in her way. Can she fix her mistakes? AH. Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

Hello everyone, here is my new fic, not sure how long it will be, not too long, not sure how often I'll get to update. I'm super busy with life so this is my escape. Hope you enjoy it. I'm having fun with it, and I'm liking the challenge of writing in real time, since I usually write in past tense. I'd like to thank my very very amazing wifey ReneeFF for her help on this. I couldn't do a lot of things without her. She's amazing, and I truly mean it.

Check out the banner and some photos of the main characters here:

crashhaleffart(dot)weebly(dot)com/broken-place(dot)html

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><p>Chapter 1<p>

"Come on, sweetie, Mama's gonna be gone all night. Give me a big kiss." Mila's lips make a smacking sound against my cheek and I smile because my two year old is so adorable.

"Gonna miss me?" I ask, fingering her dark curly locks.

Her big blue eyes look straight into mine as she nods.

"I'll miss you too, sweetie. Be good for untie Ali." I know she will. She's an amazing kid. I kiss her forehead and give Alice a hug goodbye.

Alice married my older brother Jasper last year, and she's also been my best friend since the day we met - about a year before they got married - right around the time I was pregnant. She'd become a friend when I'd lost all others, and in all honestly I was glad I now knew what a real friend was like. She's been there every second I needed her.

I give Jasper a wave as I walk down his driveway. He and Alice live only a block away. Jasper nods at me quickly and gets back to working on his car. While I know deep down inside he loves Mila, I also know he's pissed that I became a mom at sixteen and now his wife is always helping me. The two of them are in their mid twenties: they should be going out or making their own babies on Friday and Saturday nights, not taking care of mine. But Alice is kind and insists she loves taking care of her precious niece.

I wish I didn't have to burden my family, but without them Mila and I would be in a cardboard box.

I stroll the ten minute walk down to the cafe I work at on Friday and Saturday afternoons and evenings. Besides for the rain, the weather is never too bad and I enjoy the few minutes I get to just do nothing but walk. Kids my age look forward to going to parties and hooking up, but I look forward to my walks, and I kind of even like the rain. It smells nice.

At the cafe, I greet my co-workers and begin working. Customer service sucks, some people are extremely rude even though most of us are working as quickly as possible and it's all really frustrating besides for a few slow points here and there.

About an hour before closing, a guy named Jake, probably a few years older than me, walks in with a couple of guys and girls. The girls are practically hanging off him. I hate that I remember his name from writing it on the coffee cups, and I hate that his good looks have caught my attention. I'm not interested in being _interested_ in anyone. I hate most men who aren't in my family. They're all dogs.

"Hi," I smile, only because I'm working and am expected to, "how can I help you guys?"

He smiles back at me as everyone practically yells their orders. Do they expect me to hear them all at once?

"Can you guys just grab a table? I'll get the drinks, I know what you all get. It's on me."

The girls thank him with kisses on the cheek, which he needs to lean down for since he's so tall, and the guys clap him on the back. They're all dark like Jake, my guess is that they're from the Native American Reservation close by.

"Sorry," his dark eyes apologize with his words, "Some people don't know what it's like working in customer service."

I smile again, "Don't worry about it. What would you like?"

He tells me one by one and pays, "Take your time with them, we're not in a rush."

"I'll bring them out to you."

"Okay. Thanks."

I almost faint at just the fact that he's not an asshole customer and mentally slap myself before getting to the order.

_He's way too good looking._

"Girl, that boy's fine as hell." Jason says as he helps me with the order.

I smile at him and shake my head, "Maybe you should ask him out." I suggest. Jason's openly gay, an art major at the community college with crazy hair styles to match. He's pretty funny, and definitely cool. I like working with him.

"I don't think he bats for my team. He's always checking you out when he's here. I mean, who can blame him? I wish I had your ass and tits."

I shake my head again and smile, trying not to wonder if Jake really looked at me the way Jason said he did. I don't care. I'm not interested in anyone in that way. "Let's just get these over there as quickly as possible."

He sighs, "You're no fun." then helps me with the drinks.

Jason has Jake's drink so he puts it in front of him.

"Thanks, man," Jake tells Jason, giving me a glance and smile as I hand out the rest of the drinks.

The night is busy and by closing we're pretty much throwing people out.

Jason offers me a ride out back when we're done cleaning but I thank him and tell him I'd going to walk just like every other Saturday. It's late - past eleven - but it's safe here.

There are still people in the parking lot. Some I went to high school with and want to get away from as fast as possible. They ignore me so there really isn't a reason, but I still just want to get away.

"Hey!"

I pick up my step. It may be safe here, but a stranger calling out to me still makes me nervous.

"Excuse me?"

I hear jogging from behind me and almost trip over my own feet when I realize the person calling out to me is Jake.

"Yes?" I swallow.

"Hi. Rose, right?"

I nod and look behind him. His friends aren't around.

"Can I help you?" I wonder, clutching my purse to my side.

He notices and frowns. "I'm sorry: I don't mean to scare you."

I shake my head and force a smile. Jake's got a nice muscular build, he's tall, has a dark complexion with dark short hair and deep eyes to match. I can see why someone would be scared of him. He kind of has an 'I'll fuck you up' look to him. But that's not what scares me about him. It's that I like it.

When I don't say anything he scratches the back of his head, almost dissolving the bad boy image he had going on earlier. "You always walk home alone at this time?"

"It's not far." Why was he asking?

"It's not right that you're walking alone. I can give you a ride. I swear I'm not some psycho who's gonna kidnap you." He smiles at the obvious joke then frowns when I don't. "Sorry, that wasn't funny, huh?"

"Thank you for the offer but I'm okay walking. Have a nice night." I turn to continue my walk, but he says my name again.

I turn once again and stare at him, annoyed this time. I just want to get to Alice and Jasper's.

"I took my friends to the beach. I came back here to see if I'd finally work up the courage to ask you out... I didn't want to do it while you were working: I figured it was rude."

_Was that really why?_ I wondered. His friends would probably look down at him for being interested in me.

"So, I guess that's my lame way of asking if you'd have any interest in hanging out." He says this as though he's asking a question.

When I continue not to speak, he goes on.

"I mean, we're having a bit of a get together at the beach, you can come, we won't be alone. There's food and drinks. You hungry?"

I shake my head, "Thank you, but I really should go." Besides, I don't think all those girls would be very welcoming towards me. I don't do dates and I don't do hanging out.

"Oh, okay... I hope you change your mind when I ask you again next time. Goodnight, Rose."

I don't know why, and I hate it, but I cry on the walk home. I shouldn't wish to be a normal eighteen year old who can accept a date offer without too much thought. It isn't fair to wish that. I don't get to wish that.

My cellphone ringing brings me out of it and I answer when I see it's Alice.

"You okay?" she asks quickly.

"I'm fine, just finished up a bit late: I'll be there in a few minutes."

I force myself to stop my stupid tears and wipe my face before entering the house. Jasper's in the living room on the couch so I can't go to sleep until he does. I sit in the kitchen with Alice and she heats me up leftovers even though I tell her I don't want any.

She insists because she knows I only had a drink on my break. I think it's funny how she complains that I'm too skinny when she's smaller than I am.

"I got asked out." I tell her. I know I'm going to tell her sooner or later so why delay it?

She's excited but knows to be quiet about it so Jasper doesn't hear.

"I didn't say yes," I stop her before she reads too much into it.

"What? Why? Was he a loser?"

I laugh and it feels robotic. "I doubt he's a loser. The problem is that I'm one."

She looks at me disappointedly, "I wish you wouldn't say that."

I give her a smile, "I've made my peace with it." as had the rest of my family.

She reaches over and rubs my arm and everything's a little better for that brief time. "I know you don't think so, Rose, but it's okay to act your age sometimes. It's okay to think guys are cute and to have some fun."

I give her a stare to show my disagreement. She knows how I feel.

"You're going to have to let someone in some time."

"I let you in."

"You know what I mean. Make peace with the past and understand that not every guy is going to be like Emmett."

In the morning, Mila's already out of her room: she's got one here - at Jasper and Alice's. She's sitting on my legs and I'm careful not to knock her off the couch as I sit up and pull her onto my lap for a hug.

"Good morning, sweetie." I smile.

She gives me a sudden hug, "Good morning, Mama," and fusses to get down. She grabs my hand to get me to follow her to the kitchen where I can smell Alice's famous Sunday breakfast cooking.

"Morning." I tell Jasper.

Mila climbs into his lap and he helps her silently. Even though he's not talkative, Mila is drawn to him and it's obvious she likes him. She probably likes him and Alice more than me, and I can't blame her.

Alice and Mila fill breakfast with talk until we're done and I help clean up. Mila and I go for a short walk back home to my parents' house, where I give her a bath and clean her up for the day. Mom watches her for fifteen minutes while I shower. I can't help thinking about last night and what would have happened if I said yes to Jake's offer.

Would I have stayed out late, made new friends, found out when his birthday is and what music he likes?

It's useless wondering on my part.

Sunday is probably my favorite day. I don't have to clean or cook anything. I get to play with Mila and relax while she takes a nap. Mom even cooks dinner tonight and Alice and Jasper join us.

The rest of the week is like any other. I keep up with all the housework and make breakfast and dinner. On Wednesdays when Dad gets home, I take his car and do the grocery shopping while he looks after Mila.

I know Mom and Dad want me to find my own place and move out, but I can't right now. I need a full time job and I can't do that for at least another two years when it's time for Mila to go to kindergarten. The thought honestly scares me. Not the working full time part but rather Mila being away from me for part of the day five days a week. She and I are almost always together and that's about the only thing that feels right to me.

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><p>Leave me some reviews, please, they help me write.<p> 


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you to itsallinmyhead for pointing out the link wasn't working. This should work now crashhaleffart(dot)weebly(dot)com/broken-place(dot)html

And thank you to my good friend ReneeFF for not only editing but everything else too. She knows she means a lot to me. Hope you guys enjoy the next chapter.

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><p>Chapter 2<p>

Jake comes by almost every shift I have for the next couple of weeks, but he doesn't ask me out again. He just smiles, orders his drink, and thanks me. He's probably right not to ask me out again. I'm not the kind of girl that's ideal for dating.

I can't help feeling disappointed though. I want him to ask me out again, and I want to say yes and spend some time pretending to be normal. I want to know everything about him. I've spent most of my days thinking and wondering what it would be like - what he's like.

After almost a month of fantasizing, I'm just pissed off. Who the hell is this guy to get my hopes up and make me feel like a horrible person? I was fine before he asked me out, I didn't want for any man, now I'm aching for one - wondering if having someone hold me could feel good again.

In my bad mood, I rush to get ready for work and pack a few things in Mila's bag. I don't realize Jasper's called my cell until Mom comes into my room and asks why I'm ignoring his calls.

"I'm not," I frown and she hands me the house phone.

"Jazz?" I answer, grabbing my cell phone out of my bag to see I did have a bunch of missed calls. "Sorry, I was busy, didn't hear my phone."

"It's fine. Listen, we can't take Mila tonight... It's just not good for us."

"Oh." I frown and look at Mila who's playing on the floor, "That's okay, I'll ask Mom."

"Don't bother Mom and Dad again," he huffs and I can hear the annoyance in his voice. I know he and Alice had another fight because of me, otherwise she'd be calling me instead.

"Again?" I want to cry and swing my fist into the wall at the same time. "What am I supposed to do? Take Mila with me?"

"Being a parent means your kid comes first, Rose."

I am so sick of him judging me, but I appreciate his help so much that I will never say a bad word to him. He doesn't deserve my anger.

"Bye, Jazz." I finish the conversation and hang up before I say something I will regret.

I sigh as I look at Mila and dread asking Mom to look after her. It's hardly ever pretty.

As expected she gives me a lecture about how I'd be out of luck if she had something else to do tonight but finally agrees last minute, making me late to work.

I'm in a worse mood than I've been in a long time and I beg Jason to take Jake's order when he comes in. I can't deal with talking to him now.

My shift is long and tiring and all I want to do is go home to pass out on my bad.

"Rose?"

"What?" I'm shocked when I turn around and see Jake.

He smiles and backs up with a smirk, "Wow, you're kinda scary when you're in a bad mood."

"Then I'd definitely stay away from me tonight if I were you." I expect him to listen to me and leave but he continues smirking.

"Maybe I can't stay away any longer."

I raise my eyebrows in question. "Really?"

"Are you mad I didn't ask you out again?" he asks with amusement.

I put on an act as I pretend that's not at all the case. "My bad mood isn't because some guy doesn't ask me out after he says he will."

"Well, _some guy_ is asking you now... Can I drive you home?"

"I was always told not to get into a stranger's car." Although I am highly tempted to say fuck it to my current lifestyle and live a different life with him, even in a short car ride home.

"How about we walk then?"

I think about it for a second. It's safer than a car ride, if that's really what I'm worried about. "You don't have to." My bad mood dissolves at the realization that I'm suddenly a little shy in front of this gorgeous man.

"I really want to."

We don't talk much on the short walk. By the time we're outside of my parents house, he makes me promise to tell him when I'm free for a date. For some reason, too selfish and horrible for me to admit, I don't tell him that I'm never free. I'm a mom and it's my job twenty four seven for the rest of my life. He gives me his cell phone number and asks me to call or text him sometime, and he'll make himself available.

A few days later Alice is freaking out that I didn't tell her Jake walked me home. She quickly remembers that Jasper is going to a buddy's poker game next week and tells me she'll watch Mila and we'll tell my parents that we three girls are just hanging out at her place.

It's the perfect plan, since Alice and I usually do that when Jasper goes out anyway. Jake and I text each other until we figure out what we're doing. He's going to pick me up from Alice's at eight thirty and we're going to see a drive-in movie and grab some food at a drive through. I like the plan because I don't want to do anything with too many people around.

Mila plays while Alice makes me try on _seventeen_ different outfits she's arranged. A lot of them are way too dressy so I finally convince her to let me wear the skinny jeans and floral print shirt. I wear black flats and a sweater to match. I'm suddenly extremely nervous.

"What's wrong?" Alice asks as she folds a pair of jeans.

I look at Mila. "I didn't tell him." I confess.

Alice doesn't need me to explain. "You should, but do it when you're ready... If he's a good guy he won't mind."

I nod, but I'm scared he will. I don't want Jake to be the kind of guy that considers me having a child a deal breaker.

The doorbell rings and my mouth gets dry. "Go." She tells me with a wink.

I grab my handbag, kiss Mila goodbye and quickly rush downstairs.

Jake's in a black t-shirt and dark jeans, looking like a male model. I feel horrible, and definitely not good enough.

"Wow, you look amazing." He smiles brightly. "You ready to get going?"

I look back into the house before I step out and close the door. If I was a good person, I would have introduced him to my daughter who was right inside.

"Yeah, let's go." I bite my lip when he gently places his hand on my mid-back and leads me to his car. I'm quiet as he opens the door for me and then walks to his side and begins to drive. I don't know much about cars, but I know this one is nice.

I feel so out of place. I don't know what to do on dates. I've never really been on a real one.

"You okay?"

"I'm kind of nervous," I admit, feeling silly.

He laughs and nods, "Me too. It's not every day I get to take you out."

I look at him and he shrugs. "Let's just decide right now not to be nervous." He suggests.

"It's hard when it's the first date." I already hope there's a second.

"We should pretend we've just known each other for ages. Nothing new." He winks as we pass my parents house. I hold my breath and feel dread coursing through me. I have to tell him. I don't want to be this person. I'm not a liar.

"We should probably talk more than we did on that walk, huh? ... Tell me about your day?" He asks.

I turn to look at him as he drives. The lights from lamps and other cars enhance his stunning features and I feel as though I can see his soul. I can see he's kind and caring, and deserves more than I'm giving right now.

"Jake?"

He smiles and glances at me. "How do you make my name sound so good?"

I glance down with shyness.

"Yes, Rose?" he continues. He makes my name sound good too.

"I should have told you..."

I look at him again as he stops at a light and gives me an encouraging smile. "What's that?"

I decide to just blurt it out. "I'm... I have a daughter." I brace myself for the part where the whole date turns to shit and he only continues it to not be an asshole by taking me home right away.

"I know." He says instead.

I sit shocked for a second.

"I mean... people talk. I don't listen but I figured they wouldn't make up that you had a daughter if she didn't actually exist."

My heart sinks when I think of all the things he might have heard about me. I want to be a fresh, untouched canvas in his eyes. I want him to see me the way I want to be painted. There went that.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you... I don't really know why it was hard... Guess I just wanted to be normal for once... That's horrible, isn't it?"

"No, Rose. Besides, you told me two minutes into our first date. It's not like I deserved to know anything about you before tonight..."

He must be able to tell that I'm worried because he rubs my knee. It's oddly not awkward at all and I don't mind his touch. "Really, don't worry; no one said anything bad about you."

"Why are they talking about me then?" It is something that always eats at me, but I never admit to. I just want to be left alone. I don't bother any of them. I guess I am just something to gossip about.

"Because they know I'm interested in you. I was wondering if you were with anyone, so I asked."

"Oh... I'm totally free." I tell him, feeling so inexperienced with all this.

"Lucky me."

I can't help but smile widely and it feels so amazing; butterflies and all.

"Here we are... I love this place."

I love movies, so this is always a fun place to come. Jake finds us a spot after he pays to enter and we both step out to go grab a snack.

"You come here a lot?"

"Not as much as I'd like. Maybe we can make it a regular?" He suggests.

I nod and stop myself from gasping when he takes my hand while we walk like it's not a big deal. I like it. My hand's never felt so safe. His hold is warm and secure and I lean slightly into him on the walk.

"That would be nice." I suddenly picture us as two people who have regulars. We'd come see movies here, and as Mila grew, she'd come along too. It was such a distant dream; one I'd left behind.

I used to drown in sorrow; wishing things were different with Emmett. I stopped that when I realized how stupid it was. I am not about to go back to that spot. I had to be realistic. Reality is that Jake and I were on our first date, maybe it would be our one and only.

"What do you like?" He asks.

I look at the list. "Water ice?"

His beautiful smile grows. "Red flavor or blue... Yes I heard myself call colors flavors." He rolls his eyes.

I smile. "Red."

He orders two and I can't help but feel special when he holds my hand on the way back.

"So tell me all about your daughter. Bet she's awesome, huh?"

I'm scared that me not telling him means I am ashamed of her. It wasn't her I was ashamed of.

"Her name's Mila. She's sweet, perfect, funny, crazy," I laugh. "I can't even... I can't explain how important she really is to me. She's my world, and I feel kind of... I don't know, not good enough. I mean, I got her and she got me. She's everything that's good and I'm... I'm sorry. This is too deep for first date talk."

He shakes his head, "I bet you're an amazing mom. It's probably not something anyone ever feels perfect at... I'm glad you're telling me this."

"Do you always know what to say?"

He laughs. "I'm not just saying it. I mean it."

"Thank you... Should we tune into the movie?"

"Yeah. Tell me more later?"

I nod. The movie plays and we make up our own dialogue, laughing and joking around. Afterwards we pick up some food at a drive through and Jake parks at a beautiful cliff overlooking the beach. It's close to the reservation, if not on it.

"Do you live here? On the reservation, I mean?" I wonder, sipping on my drink.

"Kind of... But no."

I frown in question. I feel so much more comfortable now. Jake may look intimidating, but he's really sweet and down to earth.

"What do you mean? Do you have two homes?"

"Yeah actually. My dad is disabled and when my mom died I got put into foster care. I was eleven."

"Oh, I'm so sorry about your mom, that must have been hard."

"Yeah, it was hard to leave my dad too, he was so broken hearted. But, my foster mom is great; we kept in touch with my dad, I got to see him all the time, and we helped him out a lot. As I got older, I just got used to going back and forth between the two."

"Your foster mom sounds incredible."

"She is. She never had kids, and never got the opportunity to adopt so when I came along she put all her focus into raising me. And trust me I didn't always make it easy."

"Where you a trouble maker?" I smile. I can totally see him as a hand full when he was younger.

He smiles also and places his cup down.

"Are you still a trouble maker?" I laugh.

"You could get me into a lot of trouble." His voice is low and sexy and I can't help feeling light headed. I want nothing more than for him to kiss and touch me, but I'm nervous.

I swallow instead of asking him what he means, and lean in towards him when he does the same.

I look down at his full lips and the light stubble along his jaw. His hand reaches up and pushes my hair aside. Right before his lips meet mine, my eyes close and I let the soft, gentle kiss wash over me. My whole body gets tingly and it's as though the short moment is in slow motion.

I smile when we pull slightly apart and look into each others eyes. His are dark and it feels as though I'm the only one who's ever been looked at by him this way.

He smiles back, using his hand behind my neck to draw me back in. This time the kiss deepens and we both moan as we taste each other. It's as though I've never been kissed, it's so much more exciting then it's ever been.

I completely forget about my uneaten food and the amazing view. This is so much better.

His large but gentle hands caress my face, neck, and shoulders. Once I'm a little more relaxed I reach over to touch him too. I place one hand on his shoulder and the other over his chest. His heart is beating as hard and as fast as mine. I want him to press me up against him so I can feel his heart against mine, but I'm still on guard and know that I have to take this slow.

I moan when I pull back slowly, and he smiles. He's so beautiful.

We finally eat and talk about different things. I find out his birthday is January fourteenth, and his favorite color is blue, at which point he tells me my eyes are beautiful. I blush and thank him. I never want this to end.

Jake pulls up in front of Jasper and Alice's house two hours later and shuts off the car. He's about to get out when I stop him. He gives me a questioning look but stays put.

"My brother doesn't exactly know I went out."

"He's home?"

"Yeah," I glance at his truck is in the driveway, "I stay here a lot of the time when his wife is looking after Mila."

He nods in understanding. "I'll just wait until you're inside then."

I smile my thanks.

"We can do this again soon, right?" He asks as he reaches over and takes my hand.

"I'd love to."

"Let me know when?"

"Of course,"

He leans in to give me another kiss. It' short but sweet and leaves me happy.

"I should get inside." I sigh.

He smiles and nods. I want to spend the rest of the night making out with him but I know better.

I walk around to the side door and take my shoes off before I enter. Flats don't make the same amount of noise that high heels do but I don't want to risk waking Jasper. I know he's passed out on my usual spot; the couch.

I bite my lip and slowly sneak past him and upstairs into Alice and Jasper's room. Alice is awake, as I knew she would be. She puts down her iPad and grins at me.

I can't help but grin back, quickly changing into my pajamas and cuddling into the warm blankets.

"So," she says excitedly. "Was it amazing?"

I cover my face with my hands, feeling my cheeks burn up. "So amazing." I mumble.

"Did he kiss you?"

I nod and peek at her through my fingers. "He's a really good kisser. I still feel all hot."

"Want a minute alone?" she jokes.

"Ew, Alice, no."

She laughs and we spend hours talking about romance. It's amazing and I want to feel this way all the time.


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you my darling ReneeFF for your help.

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><p>Chapter 3<p>

Jake and I finally get to see each other again a week later when Jason offers to babysit Mila. I tell Mom I'm helping him with a project. She complains that Mila shouldn't be out with us so late, but I tell her I've promised Jason. I know it's not fair to lie and it seems as though I'm putting Mila second, but I just know if I tell Mom the truth she'll all but kill me.

When, or rather, if, Jake and I get more serious, I'd be able to take Mila with me, or at least not lie about it to my parents. I don't want to make anything out of it now, though.

Mom finally leaves me alone and Jason picks the two of us up, then Jake picks me up from Jason's. I've decided it's better I wait before introducing Mila and Jake to one another.

Jake takes me to his foster mom's house. She's away on business, so we have the whole house to ourselves. It's close to being a palace. It's on its own street and everything. Apparently, Esme, his foster mother, is an extremely experienced antique dealer and repairer, as well as an heiress. She moved here to raise Jake close to his father and home, and since they've become family over the last eleven years, this is where they chose to live together.

"She's from New York originally?"

He nods.

"Do you think you'll ever move there?"

"Maybe when I don't have anything tying me to here anymore." He answers with sadness to his tone. I know he's talking about his father.

"Well, I'm glad you're here."

"Me too, and Esme will love you... My dad too."

I wish I could say the same to him, but I don't. I continue to watch him move around the kitchen as he finishes preparing our dinner. It's extremely sexy to have someone cook for me this way. Well, not just _someone_. I feel myself staring and smiling. I even check out his ass when he's not looking.

He's in dark jeans and a plain white t-shirt, his muscles hypnotizing me as they stand out with every small movement.

I clear my throat and take a drink of water, "So, tell me about college?"

He goes on to tell me he's recently graduated, and is just taking a break before he goes to grad school in the city. Esme has an apartment there, so he'll be using it during the week and coming home on the weekends. He also has a whole career plan. It's sort of depressing when I realize how out of control my life is. I don't even know how to begin moving forward.

"What about you?" He nods for me to follow him to the dining room as he carries our food and I bring the drinks. "You think you want to go to college?"

"I always wanted to." I shrug. "Plans just changed after I had Mila."

"Maybe you'll have more time when she begins school."

I nod. "That's what I was thinking. I still haven't given up completely, don't worry."

"You should never give up, no matter how long it takes. I'm just lucky I could do it right out of high school. What do you think you'd like to study?"

Even though the table is huge, Jake's set up two places right across from one another so we're close. He begins eating as he waits for me to answer. I wish I had something smart to say.

"I know it's stupid," I can't believe I'm about to admit this out loud again. The only people who don't laugh at me about it are Alice and Jason.

Jake smiles and he has this way of making me feel like he won't laugh, not just because I'm here, but because he'll accept it.

"I kind of... I've wanted to be an actress since I was a kid."

His kind smile grows and I blush, looking down into my food for a second. "It's silly I know, and I think my parents figure I've grown out of it... I don't think I'll study drama though. What kind of a job can I get here with that degree?"

"It's sad when we feel we have to be practical. You should do what you love..." He tells me. "Maybe just take some practical classes on the side to make your parents happy."

I don't speak for a second and taste the food. I don't want to tell him that I don't have time to live my dreams. I have new dreams now. Dreams that my daughter will be proud of me, and have a good life. I can't give her what she needs if I don't go for something reasonable.

"How's the food?" He asks.

"It's incredible, thank you so much for cooking. This is all really nice."

"Thanks for saying that, but I know I'm not the best chef. My mom told me this might impress you."

I laugh and feel all warm inside that he's talking to his mom about me. "You asked her what you should do?"

He nods, "She likes my cooking... but I think that's just because she doesn't like doing it herself so she'd rather I do it."

I laugh and assure him it's good. Very good.

When we're done with dinner and light conversation, we take the dirty dishes and put them in the dishwasher. He says the maid will clean up the rest of the mess tomorrow and I act like having a maid doesn't blow my mind.

"You sure you don't want anything other than water? We have a wine cellar; you can pick any one you want."

I hold up my glass of water. "I'm good with this, thanks." I'm not old enough to drink, not that that's the problem.

Jake leads me to the living room where we sit on the incredibly comfortable couch and continue to talk. He makes me tell him what my dream role to play would be and we both laugh when I reply with, "a vampire or witch."

Our short conversation quickly turns into a make out session. It's so much more intense than our first couple of kisses and it's as though every second is making it harder to pull away and think straight.

His wonderful hands, which have touched me but kept their distance, slowly move to my hips and thighs as he's about to pull me on top of him.

This finally makes me break the kiss. I'm dizzy and he looks it too.

I sigh and pull my hands away from him. He smiles and stops. "I'm sorry."

I shake my head. "No, don't be." I hate to admit it because I don't want him to think I'm pathetic. "This has been the most romantic night... ever, but... I just can't... I can't let myself go completely. I... I don't want to. The last time I did..."

He caresses my cheek and moves in to kiss it. "I promise we'll stick to just kissing... I like kissing you."

I look into his dark, comforting eyes and let him kiss me again. This time it's soft and light. I like kissing him too.


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you to ReneeFF for her help.

* * *

><p>Chapter 4<p>

Jake and his friends come in during my next shift. It's kind of awkward because we're surrounded by people. His friends go on ignoring me like usual, and Jason makes fun of me; telling me I'm blushing.

Jake smiles at me the whole time and asks if I'll meet him after my shift. I nod and go on working. I can feel his eyes on me as I work. It's as though this night will never end, but finally it does, and Jake's outside by his car waiting.

"Hey," he greets me with a warm hug and I snuggle into it. I need it more than I realize.

"Hi." I smile.

"Long night?"

I nod and roll my eyes. "I smell like coffee."

"You smell amazing." He leans down, holding me still by my shoulders while he kisses me.

I relax and kiss him back. "Don't stop." I'm almost embarrassed by my need for his affection but he gives it to me so willingly.

He wraps his strong arms around me and deepens the kiss. "Come to the beach with me?"

I continue to hug him but shake my head. "I have to get to my brother's, Mila's there."

"She'll be asleep till morning though, right?"

I don't respond.

"I'd like to introduce you to my friends."

I laugh and pull back.

"What?"

"They won't like me."

He seems confused. "They're nice. Don't worry, they will like you."

"The girls look like they're in love with you."

He smiles. "They're not. I've known them all since I was a kid."

"Doesn't mean they don't want you."

He smiles and pulls me in. "Just because you want me, doesn't mean anyone else does."

I laugh too and hide my face in his chest, "If you really believe that, then you're crazy."

"You don't want me?" He smirks. He knew I was talking about the girls, not me.

I blush as I stumble through words that don't make sense and then just decide to shut up.

He laughs and lets it go. "Come on, please?"

It's so hard to say no when he seems like he truly wants me there. I feel this pull to him and I want to do what he says.

When we arrive to the beach, his friends are around a fire and are more welcoming than I expected, not that anyone is going out of their way to be extra nice to me or anything. I sit next to Jake and listen to the conversation. I chime in twice, and they all listen and respond. I have this feeling they're only doing it for Jake, which I understand - I'd do the same.

I'm grateful Jake doesn't want to say late. We say goodbye and he takes my hand as we walk back to his car. "Thank you for coming. They weren't too bad were they? I mean, they'll warm up to you more as they get to know you."

I smile and nod. "You were right, they are nice." They're his friends which means they're important to him.

He kisses the top of my head as we reach his car. "You're really special, Rose, you know that?"

"Thank you." I grin. "You make me feel special."

"I'm glad..." he leans down and kisses me softly. When he straightens out again he sighs. "I know you did one thing for me today already, but would it be horrible of me to ask you to do something else?"

I shake my head no. If his kisses keep getting better and better the way they are, I'd do just about anything to make him happy. _Just about._

"I told my dad about you, and he wants to meet you... I told him we might drop by to say hello... I understand if you don't want to."

"I do." Jake makes me believe I can do anything, and I feel so good around him. If meeting his father was what he wanted, then I did too. "I'm still going to be nervous though." I bite my lip.

Jake smiles and shakes his head. "Trust me, my dad will love you." He opens the door and gives me another short kiss. I get in and chew my lip nervously while we drive up one road and pull off onto another.

"Isn't it a bit too late?" I wonder.

I watch Jake as he shakes his head and keeps his eyes on the road. "My dad's a night owl. He'd actually prefer guests at this time."

I nod and we turn onto another dirt road.

There's a small house sitting alone with the woods behind it. It's beautiful, in a not so beautiful way. Cozy and homey, perhaps. "This is where I was born and where I grew up, well, and at my mom's, but you've been there."

I smile. "It's beautiful."

"We can go for a walk in the woods some day, if you want."

I nod and don't realize I haven't left the car until Jake is at my door offering me his hand. I decide to be brave and take it, stepping out and leaning into him. He hugs me and kisses the top of my head again. It feels so nice.

"Are you sure it's not too late?" I ask as we walk over to the front door.

"I'm sure."

When we walk in the television is on and his dad wheels himself away from the side of the sofa and gives us a smile. I can't help but smile too. Jake looks like his dad, only his dad has very long hair, longer than Jakes, longer than mine.

"Rose, welcome, Jake can't stop talking about you. It's great to meet you, I'm glad he didn't keep you away like he does the other girls." We shake hands.

I smile at Jake and he grins, shrugging. "There aren't any other girls."

"Well, not right now of course. I meant before." His dad clarifies.

"Good save, Dad."

I laugh and Jake tightens his arm around me. "By the way, Rose, this is my dad, Billy."

"It's great to meet you, sir."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, sweetheart. Call me Billy."

I nod. I'm glad I came here; meeting Jake's dad just makes me feel like I've learned a whole other side of Jake. The more I know the more I like. He's perfect.

"Jake looks like you." I point out.

"Yeah, he's lucky."

Jake laughs and they both lead me to the small living room. Jake grabs me a glass of water and I smile and listen to Billy as he tells me about the time Jake ran away. "He wanted to be raised by wolves out in the woods."

I laughed and look at Jake as he shook his head. "I didn't ask her over here for you to make me sound crazy."

Billy ignores him and continues with the story. "He swore he was meant to be a wolf. He asked everyone if they knew a werewolf who could change him so he could finally start living like his true self."

I look at Jake. "How old were you?"

He shakes his head and Billy tells me he was six. I ask if I can see pictures and I regret it when I notice so many of them are of his mom. She's so beautiful and her eyes are glued on Jake in every picture. It's obvious she was an amazing mother, wife, and all around person. I wish I was like her.

I listen to Billy speak about how kind she was, but Jake stays quiet.

When we finally leave, it's quiet in the car until I speak. "I'm sorry I asked to see pictures. I should have known your mom would be in them."

Jake's hand moves onto my knee. "Don't be sorry. I want you to know everything about me... about my family."

I want to tell him the same thing but I can't. I put my hand over his and squeeze it.

"She was so beautiful."

Jake nods in agreement. "Sometimes I remember her so clearly... and other times it's like she never existed... It's scary. I don't want to forget her, but it hurts to remember."

I lean over to hug him and he hugs me back with strong arms, holding me tightly. "Maybe when you think you can, you can remember and tell me and I'll be here."

We don't speak again until he pulls in front of Jasper and Alice's house. He hugs me again and I kiss his chin. He smiles at me handsomely when we pull back, and he cups my face. "Can't wait to see you again."

"Can't wait to see you." I breathe and he kisses me.

I'm successful once again in sneaking into the house.


	5. Chapter 5

I'm sorry I know it's been awhile but I'm working on finishing this as soon as possible.

Edited by ReneeFF, thank you, my darling.

* * *

><p>Chapter 5<p>

The huge house is quiet besides for the sounds Jake and I are making on the top of his bedsheets. I don't know how I got here; my legs wrapped around him as we touch and feel and never stop kissing. I want his hot skin against mine. My body is screaming for more.

"Oh, god..." I whisper as his mouth moves down my jaw and neck, his fingers interlocked with mine above my head.

I grip onto his hands and arch my back. I can feel him through both our pants and I want to cry out for more. It's scary and thrilling and oddly comforting at the same time. For the first time in a long time I feel normal. This is what it's meant to feel like.

He growls against my neck and pulls back, looking down at me as I look up at him.

"I'm sorry."

I frown. "Don't be sorry. Just kiss me."

He kisses me and pulls back again. "We both said just kissing, but um... this feels like more." We both shift so we're laying side by side, facing each other.

"I like you a lot, and I want to do things right by you."

I smile and caress his face. "You're one of a kind, aren't you?"

He smiles too. "I can wait, Rose, you know that, right? It's not a trick when I say it."

I nod. "Thank you. I trust you."

"Stay a little longer?"

I move in to snuggle against him. "A little longer."

Jake had picked me up from work earlier and asked me to come over. I told him I could only do it for an hour or two, and we both agree it's better than nothing.

This goes on for the next couple of weeks. And on the third week I figure I should explain.

I moan as I pull my face away from his, our legs still intertwined. I rest my head on the pillow and take a deep breath to calm down. His hair is wild from my hands and it makes him all the more adorable. He's looking at me with heavy eyes and for a second I picture him looking at me that way when we're both naked.

With that thought, I pull further away.

He adjusts himself and gives me a smirk. I frown, "I'm sorry,"

"I'm not."

"I feel like I should explain."

"You don't have to, babe, I'm not gonna make you do anything you don't want to... no matter how badly I want you." He caresses my arm and I shiver.

"I don't want you to think I'm scared of you... It's just that the last time I had sex with someone my life changed, in a huge way... You're the first person I've met that makes me feel like I can disconnect those two things and have fun again... I don't think I'm quite there yet though, and I want to only have you on my mind when we..."

He plays with my hair and looks me in the eyes as I tell him all this. I believe him when he says he understands.

I'm seriously taken back when he asks. "So when do I get to meet Mila?"

I don't know what else to say besides. "I don't know."

He lets it go. "Well, my mom and her fiancé are coming back from her work trip tomorrow. She said she wants to meet you. Can you do dinner some time next week?"

"Yeah..." I answer sadly, "Jake, I'm really sorry," I can tell he's hurt. He's so open with me and I haven't let him into my life at all. "I just need some more time... It's hard when I don't know how... how all of this works."

He pushes my hair aside. "I like you and you like me, that's the only thing that's gotta work, babe... and hopefully Mila will like me too, then things will be perfect. What do you think?"

I stare at him for a minute. He smiles, "What?"

"You're just perfect, that's all."

He pulls me closer and makes me smile. "You're the perfect one."

* * *

><p>Later that week I arrange for Mom to look after Mila while I "go shopping with Jason". She doesn't think I've gone out in a long time so she doesn't give me a hard time about it. She even tells me she hopes I find some good deals. I tell her I'm only window shopping. I wonder if she's figured me out yet. I wish it was easy for me to tell her about Jake, but since she thinks I'm a fuck up, I don't want her to judge Jake that way too.<p>

I meet Jake on the corner of my street. He tells me I look beautiful, kisses me, and holds my hand as we take the few steps together to his car.

At his house, Billy is already at the table with Esme. She's beautiful, the kindness just beaming from her green eyes. She's so welcoming, gushing over my hair, and how sweet I am. Her fiancé Carlisle is super nice also.

They tell me about their wedding plans and how they met. Carlisle was actually her driver for ten years before they began dating.

I'm really glad I've met all of them, each one is nicer than the next.

When dinner is over, I help Esme with clearing the table while the guys talk.

"Thank you so much for inviting me to dinner, Esme, I'm really glad to finally meet you. Jake talks about you a lot. He loves you very much."

"He's my ball of sunshine." She smiles. "And I'm glad he met you, he likes you a lot... not that I'm surprised. You two make a wonderful couple."

"I'm happy we met too. I'm really lucky."

"He's lucky too, sweetheart." She gives me a quick side hug.

I realize that I should make more of an effort with Jake. I have to talk to my mom first, hopefully she'll be cool about it.


	6. Chapter 6

Thanks to ReneeFF for editing.

* * *

><p>Chapter 6<p>

I chip my nail polish as I stand in the kitchen with Mom and debate over if I should tell her now or not. I've met Jake's dad, his mom and even her fiancé. I've been with his family and they've welcomed me. I want mine to welcome Jake the same way, but I know they won't. It's my fault; they all see me as a screw up, and they won't see Jake and me any differently. It's as though it's impossible for me to ever do anything right again in their eyes.

"What's wrong?" Mom smiles.

I frown and shake my head. I can't tell her. "Nothing."

"You want to do each others nails?"

I smile and nod. I've loved doing this with her since as far back as I can remember.

"I'll go grab the stuff." I tell her, heading into the bathroom. Even before Mom allowed me to wear nail polish, she let me help. This was our thing, and it always made me feel better.

I set up our nail products and the box of nail polishes we've collected over the years on the kitchen table. She washes her hands and joins me, picking us out a few different colors.

I sit quietly and let her take my current color off. I've chipped half of it away anyway.

"Seriously, Rose, what's wrong? You seem so deep in thought."

She tucks a piece of my hair behind my ear and I lie to her again, "I'm just a little tired."

She sighs as she continues what she was doing. "Life doesn't get any easier... Doesn't help that your responsibilities started before most peoples do."

I keep my mouth shut because I don't want another lecture or fight about how I made my own choices. I shouldn't have even said I was tired.

"I just meant I'm a little sleepy. I woke up early this morning and couldn't get back to sleep." I stare at her for a second while she isn't looking. I miss her; the mom she used to be. I miss my dad and brother too. Why couldn't they just give me an 'I understand' every once in awhile, or a hug? I'm so sick of the judging all the time. Why was everything I did not good enough anymore?

"There's a guy." I blurt out.

Mom stops and gives me a brief look. She probably already guessed it.

"I really like him."

"Does he like you?" She asks calmly.

I smile at the thought of how sweet Jake is and nod. "Yeah, he likes me too."

She looks at me again and I shrug. I'm not going to apologize for liking him.

"Honey... I know it's hard not to want the things other girls your age have but—"

"Just because I have a daughter doesn't mean I can't have a boyfriend too." I quickly put in.

"It sort of does, Rose... I'm sorry, I know it's hard to hear, but... you don't really need to be bringing anything or anyone else into this situation."

"Why?"

"I'm just afraid that if you fall in love with this boy, it's going to be all you think about... You need to be focused."

"I am, Mom," I almost wine like a little child. I sound like one; wanting my mommy's approval so I can be guilt-free.

"Aren't all guys the same? Didn't you say that?" she tries another approach.

I shake my head, "I said those things when I was hurting over Emmett... Jake's not the same. He's sweet, and charming, and caring... and really nice to me."

"Emmett was sweet. Emmett was charming, caring, nice... He used you. Don't let anyone else do that to you."

"So I should never take a chance on someone else again?" Wasn't she supposed to encourage me and tell me that love makes the world go round?

"Maybe not never, but not now."

I pull my hands away when she's done and frown, looking down into my lap.

"Don't be mad at me, Rose, I'm just giving you advice. If you want to get hurt again, I can't very well stop you, can I?"

I decide I don't want to talk about this anymore.

"I'm going to bed." I say, standing up from the table.

"You don't want your nails done?"

I shake my head and say goodnight quickly, peeking my head into the living room to do the same with Dad.

Mila is asleep upstairs so I'm quiet as I get ready for bed.

I text Jake, wishing him a goodnight and he sends me a kissy face smiley. It makes me miss him even more than I already do.


	7. Chapter 7

Thank you to my ReneeFF for editing

* * *

><p>Chapter 7<p>

Jake slides my sweater down my shoulders and kisses my newly exposed skin. It makes me press myself into him more as I'm straddling his lap on the couch. My movement makes him growl, and he pulls my sweater back into place and slouches back on the couch.

I remain upright with a frown and run my hands over his amazing chest. He takes my hands into his and gives me a tug. "Come here."

I rest my head on his chest and smile. "If you're free... did you want to meet Mila this week?" I know it'll make him happy, and I want him to meet the best person in my life.

I laugh when he pushes me back and sits up; he grabs me so I don't fall from his sudden movement.

"Seriously?"

I nod and smile wider.

"I'm free whenever you girls are. Just name the time."

* * *

><p>I'm really nervous about Mila and Jake meeting. I know there is no possible way anyone couldn't like her, but if she doesn't like him, then that would be upsetting. I also wonder if I've let enough time pass, if I'm not making a mistake by letting them meet.<p>

Jake's amazing though. I know he'll be sweet with her.

It's Monday and Jake arrives to pick us up at ten. We're alone at home so I let him in.

"Hey babe," he kisses me. He seems so excited.

"Hi. Mila's in the living room. I told her we're going to hang out with our new friend. She's a bit shy, but I can tell she's excited."

Jake follows me and kneels down by Mila at the couch. "Hi there, beautiful. It's great to meet you." He shakes her little hand with his large one, and I think I fall in love with him right here and now.

Mila looks at him through her lashes without rest. She's a little shy because she won't stop clinging to me, but she's also staring at Jake the whole time so I can tell she's fascinated by him.

The three of us drive to the beach. I carry Mila as Jake sets up the shade and blankets. The beach isn't crowed at all. It's a beautiful day. I set Mila down and take her clothes off. She's in her cute pink bathing suit that Alice brought. I make sure she's covered in sunscreen before I take my clothes off too.

Jake goes back to the car a few times to bring our food over and a few toys he's gotten for us to play with.

I sunbath as I watch Mila and Jake. He talks to her the whole time, explaining how to build a sand castle and she soon begins helping. He's so friendly and kind with her that it doesn't take long for her to start talking to him. She actually doesn't stop. Jake seems like he loves it, he's a big kid and it makes him even sexier.

It's as though Mila and Jake are drawn to each other. When we decide to go into the water, Mila no longer wants me. I'm not hurt, I like seeing the two of them together. He holds her in the water, all his attention on her, making sure she's having fun.

By the time we decide to leave, she's fallen asleep on his shoulder. The beach is enough to knock anyone out.

When we get into the car, Jake kisses me and I smile. "I don't know why I was so worried... I think she likes you. Thank you for being so amazing today."

"You are so welcome, babe."

* * *

><p>Jake suggests his place and places Mila gently down on his bed when we're there.<p>

He extends his hand to me, "Join me on the coach," and kisses me. "Just cuddling."

I nod and we spoon on the couch, where I soon fall asleep as well.

When I wake up I can hear Jake. He's talking to Mila, telling her that her mommy is asleep and that they should try to be quiet. I don't move and just watch them. His back is to me as he sits on the bed with her. They're playing with what looks like his wallet.

He's so sweet with her it makes my heart melt. I love feeling this way and it's all because of him.

"Hey, you two," I say softly.

Jake turns to me and smiles, "Hey, babe... I don't have any toys..."

I smile because Mila already has his things out of it. I quickly come over to the other side of the bed to pull it away. She's mad at me until I turn off my phone and give that to her instead.

I direct my attention to Jake now and he smiles, putting his arm around me and pulling me in.

I look up at him the whole time. He's amazing and I want him to be a part of everything.

"This might suck but... I want you to meet my family."

"Why would that suck?" He smiles kindly and touches my hair. "I would really like that... you know I would."

I sit up so we can look at each other easier while we talk. He takes my hand.

It's hard for me to say this stuff to him, because I love the way he sees me. "They all think I'm a screw up... and maybe I am, but... I don't want to be. I want to them to be proud of me like they used to... I told my mom about you..." I sigh and roll my eyes.

"And what happened?"

"What I knew would happen... She said I can't be a normal girl. She makes me feel bad for wanting to be one... and doesn't think I should be in a relationship because... I don't know, I guess she wants me to concentrate on being a mom more." I look at Mila. If I only ever make one person proud I hope it's her, but I honestly don't believe my dating Jake will affect that.

"You're a great mom... Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Look at her," he smiles, looking at her, "she's perfect and it's all because of you. It's your job to make sure she's safe and happy and healthy, and she's all those things."

I shake my head. "My family helps a lot." A tear finally drops. I wouldn't be able to without them.

He smooths my hair down. "And that's their job, and they shouldn't make you feel shitty about it."

He holds me as I silently cry into his chest for a short time.


	8. Chapter 8

Thank you to my lovely ReneeFF for editing

* * *

><p>Chapter 8<p>

I've spent the whole day cooking a big dinner for tonight and making the house perfect. It's as though Mila knows tonight is important, as she's been a really calm and quiet version of herself. Dad comes home first, takes a shower, and relaxes on the couch.

I ask him in my sweetest voice to look after Mila while I get dressed. He gives me this look like I'm really pushing all this. I can tell he's not happy I'm bringing someone home.

I continue with the sweet voice. "I made tiramisu... I know it's your favorite... Please, Dad? I've got to get ready before he gets here. I'll be super quick."

He just gives me a little smile. "Where's Grandpa's girl?" He calls out to Mila.

I grin and kiss his cheek. "Thanks, Dad!"

I'm really nervous about tonight, but I'm trying to be positive. I've already prepared Jake for the worst just incase.

I have the quickest shower possible, throw on some plain black tights and a knitted sweater, then apply some light make up.

Mila's in Dad's lap when I come back into the living room. "Okay, thanks, Grandpa." I'm about to take her from him when he frowns. "We're okay here."

I smile and nod. Good, that gives me time to set up. Mom, Jasper, and Alice would be here any second. If I stopped now, I'd fall apart.

"Dinner party!" I hear Alice yell as soon as the front door opens. Jasper groans from behind her. "I've got the wine."

Mom follows in behind them, amused by Alice. "You're only allowed half a glass, missy." She jokes. Alice is a complete lightweight.

Alice hugs me, telling me she's so excited and can't wait to meet Jake. Jasper's already with Dad in the living room.

"Looks nice," Mom quickly comments before putting her things down.

"And it smells amazing!" Alice winks at me and holds my hand tight. "I'm here, don't worry," she says lowly and eases some of my nerves.

Jake arrives soon after and gives me a kiss. He's got a huge bouquet of pink and purple peonies that he hands to me with a handsome smile. I feel really emotional because a man's never gotten me flowers before. He's got two other arrangements for Mom and Alice and two bottles of scotch for Dad and Jasper.

"Jacob, you really shouldn't have," Mom tells him, but I can tell she's impressed.

"My mom taught me to do this, wouldn't feel right if I came empty handed. Thank you for inviting to your home. It smells amazing." He's eyes are on me when he says the last part. He knows I cooked.

The flowers are close to my face because I'm still admiring them, but I'm sure he can tell I'm blushing.

"Speak for yourself, Mom. He totally should have gotten me these," Alice smiles and hooks her free arm around Jake's, smelling her flowers.

Jake chuckles. "Glad you like them."

Jasper hasn't spoken.

I introduce everyone to Jake and suggest we go to the dining room.

I'm surprised but happy when Mila asks for Jake. Dad hands her over a little too slowly, but Mila's all too happy to have her arms around his neck. "Got you something too, princess. We'll open it together later, okay?"

She nods. Alice is really excited, Mila is content, but I can't tell everyone else's reactions so far.

Mom and Dad grill Jake with so many questions that he hardly has any time to eat.

"Let him breathe, guys," I say jokingly.

I notice Jasper roll his eyes and Alice nudge him. Mom and Dad apologize but don't really stop. By the end of dinner, he's told his life story twice. He doesn't seem to mind. Overall, things are going no worse or better than I expected.

After dinner, Jake and Mila open up her new book and read it. She loves it and I'm pretty sure I love him.

Jasper's still being moody. He talks, but only a little. He's definitely not going out of his way to be friendly.

I feel confident that Mom and Dad like Jake though, and really, that's what matters most.

It's time for Mila to go to bed and Alice insists she do it. Mila says goodnight and Mom makes us all coffee.

This time Jake has the chance to ask Mom and Dad about their jobs, where they went to school and stuff like that. Even Jasper answers questions.

Alice joins us, sitting in Jasper's lap and trying to cheer him up with simply being her. It seems to work a little. The two of them leave a little while later and Mom and Dad head to bed early.

Jake helps me clean up even though I tell him it's fine. We finally sit in the living room and both take a deep breath, laughing at our joined action.

"We made it." He winks and pulls me closer.

I sit side ways on his lap and sigh, "Thank you for being amazing." We kiss and he shakes his head.

We've been talking all night, or at least he has, so just sitting and watching television is welcomed. I've never been happier.


	9. Chapter 9

Thank you to ReneeFF for editing.

* * *

><p>Chapter 9<p>

The next morning during breakfast, I sit there and can't help but smile at Mom and Dad.

"He's great, right?"

Mom nods. "He's a fine young man, Rose, but that doesn't mean you should be in a relationship with him."

I feel like I can never win with them. That shuts me up and wipes the smile I've been wearing off my face.

Their attitude isn't going to stop me from being with him. He's who I want.

* * *

><p>All the wedding events roll around quickly. Alice helps me with dressing, and Jake makes me feel like a princess. After the rehearsal dinner we have the whole night to ourselves, so we lock his bedroom door and stay snug under the covers.<p>

Esme is sure she wants me here for everything leading up to the wedding and I am honored. Jasper and Alice have taken Mila for a few days so I don't have to worry about her.

Falling asleep in Jake's arms is more than I ever imagined it would be. I think I'm ready to let myself go tomorrow night. Esme and Carlisle will have left for their honeymoon by then, and I was definitely over all the shit that had happened with Emmett.

"I'm really happy," I whisper, not sure if he's asleep or not. His face is relaxed and he looks peaceful in the darkness.

When his lips curl into a small smile, I smile too. He tightens his arms around me. "Me, too."

* * *

><p>The wedding was stunning, and it wasn't until the reception that everything went to shit.<p>

When I spotted the devil that was Emmett it felt as though a black cloud had wrapped itself around my body. What the hell was he doing here?

It's obvious that he spotted me before I did him, because he doesn't look shocked at all when our eyes meet. Jake's busy talking to a few people when I excuse myself away from the group and meet Emmett on the balcony.

"Long time no see," he smiles.

"Yeah." It's the most I can say.

"How do you know the couple?"

"I'm... seeing the bride's son." I swallow. He's brought back every negative emotion with him, just when I thought I'd let it go.

His smile is amazed. "Never met him. My parents know Esme professionally." He explains, gesturing for us to venture further out onto the balcony.

I lean an elbow on the railing to help keep me steady. I'm probably white as a ghost.

"How's Mila?"

I expect him to say anything but that. He'd been so cruel since the minute he found out I was pregnant to when he left for college. We hadn't spoken in over two years.

My silence prompts him to speak again. "Don't I have the right to know how she is?"

"Of course you don't." I frown. What a stupid question.

"Well, if she is mine like you claim she is, I have a legal right."

My emotions have me so confused and furious I don't know what is the right thing to say. He'd accused me of sleeping with other guys and refused to believe she was his. He made my life hell in high school. "You have no rights." I hold onto the railing tighter because I can feel my hands shaking.

"Babe?" Jake's voice is faint but I look over and he's by my side in a second. He puts his arm around my waist and extends his right one to Emmett.

"Jacob Black."

"Emmett McCarty." He smiles then looks back at me. "You'll be getting a call from my lawyer soon,_ babe_."

He walks back into the party and leaves me in Jake's arms. Jake takes me to a chair and kneels down in front of me, asking me to explain.

I feel like I can't breathe though. I'm beyond scared and just want to go and see Mila. All I can say is that I'm sorry.

He cups my face and makes me look at him. "Just breathe, okay? I'll be back in thirty seconds, just gonna grab you a water."

He's back quickly, for which I'm thankful. I don't want to be alone. I can't drink the water, I don't care about it.

"I'm sorry I'm ruining everything."

"You're not ruining anything. What are you talking about?"

"You should be in there."

"I'm right where I should be." He holds my hands in my lap. "Don't worry, all the wedding stuff is over with. Everyone's just mingling and they'll start to leave soon."

I look into his dark comforting eyes and nod. "Okay."

"Okay?" He smiles. "So just try to relax and tell me what happened. Was that Mila's father?"

I nod and squeeze my eyes shut because it feels like I'm going to cry. Hearing him ask that sounds so dirty. How could I ever have been with Emmett?

He sits with me, holds me, and calls Alice when I ask him too. I know it's stupid. Mila's with them and she's safe but I just need to hear it. I'm terrified of losing her.

"No one can take her from you, I promise." He assures me.

I nod. It may be a stupid fear Emmett's just put upon me, but it doesn't make me any less scared knowing that.

"I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. You're not alone."

I cry against his shoulder and he keeps me warm. He only leaves me alone for five minutes while he says goodbye to his mom then comes back and pulls me up. "Let's go home. They've left for their honeymoon."


	10. Chapter 10

Thank you, ReneeFF for editing

* * *

><p>Chapter 10<p>

The next couple of weeks are a complete blur from all the stress I'm under. Mom and Dad have to get a lawyer for which I'll have to pay them back. Emmett's family is very well-off, so nothing concerning money is a bother to them. They've got the best they can have. My parents both work hard for everything and I know they're feeling the effects of forking out extra money for this.

His lawyers rush the fraternity test like his life depends on it. I wish she wasn't his, but I know she is. I'm constantly dealing with paper work and trying to understand it all, but really all they say they want is visitation rights.

My lawyer makes a point that Emmett didn't want anything to do with Mila and denied she was his since before her birth, but he uses his age as an excuse. He claims he was terrified back then and he sees his mistakes now. All he wants is to make things right.

The judge decides on supervised visits for a month, and at that point, the person appointed to the case will decide if he can see Mila without supervision. I hate the whole thing.

He's got two years of child support to pay off, on top of what he'll be paying for from now on. He says he'll gladly do it; he just wants to be a part of his daughter's life.

I don't trust him, but I have no idea what else it could be.

After one of the court meetings, he pulls me aside and asks if we can go for coffee. I accept because whether I like it or not, we need to talk.

I'm furious at him for doing this to me. I haven't eaten or slept since the second he came back into my life.

"I know you're upset, but my intentions are good, I promise. I just want to be a part of my daughter's life, and make sure she grows up right. I want her to know she can count on me. I need to start having a relationship with her now if I'm ever going to build that between us."

"Emmett…" I can't listen to his voice anymore. That's all I've been hearing. "There is nothing I want more than to keep you away from _my_ daughter. This whole thing is killing me because there's nothing I can do about it. We've been fine without you, and we'll continue to be."

"It's not the two of you I'm concerned with... Look, I've changed universities so I can be closer to her, and I'm fighting for her, aren't I? You don't need me, it's fine, trust me I don't need you... But maybe Mila deserves to have a father, who are you to deny her that?"

"She hasn't had a father this whole time and she's fine."

"I regret that, I have ever since I moved away. I think about her all the time, Rose, I was just scared shitless. I wasn't ready to be a dad."

"And I wasn't ready to be a mom, but being ready doesn't matter when it happens." I felt like I was talking to a brick wall.

"Look, I didn't ask you to have coffee with me so we could argue."

I hadn't even touched my coffee and I just now realized we were in a crowded cafe. When someone placed their hand on my shoulder I looked up to see it was Jake. I instantly felt a little better.

"You ready to go, babe?"

"Yeah," I stood and held his hand, walking away without a goodbye.

* * *

><p>The next day while Mom and Dad are at work, Alice drops by to take Mila with her to the mall. I go for a run to clear my mind. It doesn't really work but at least I've gotten some exercise. When I get home Emmett is on the front steps waiting, his car in my parent's drive way.<p>

I pull my ear buds out as I approach. "Your boyfriend seems like a dick."

"Not a good line to lead off with, Emmett," I warn.

"I've seen him a number of times and he doesn't even acknowledge I'm there."

"Well, I could say the same about your girlfriend." I tilt my head. "I'm sure they just want to stay out of it."

"Trust me; Bella wants nothing more than for Mila to be in our lives."

"And Jake wants nothing more than for you to be out of our lives." I feel so much hatred towards him it isn't normal.

He finally stands. "Actually, Rose, he's the reason I'm here... I don't really think I like having him around my daughter." As much as I hate thinking about when we dated, I quickly remember what a racist he is. He doesn't even know it too, which makes it even worse.

I frown but act brave. "Well, you have no say in the matter." Now I was terrified. I know how cruel he can be. He has something up his sleeve.

"Break it off with him, or I'll make sure he gets this." He hands me an envelope from the back of his pocket.

I don't have to look inside to know what it is.

"Why do you want me to be miserable?" Hadn't he done enough?

"I don't need a reason. Unfortunately, you're Mila's mother, and I want all your efforts to go into raising her – not sucking that douchebag off." His smile is bright and happy.

"Enjoy those, and let me know if you want the whole video."

"Why would you do this?" My voice has gotten louder even though I don't mean it to. "You have your girlfriend, you're happy... I just want the same."

He looks at me without an answer for a second. "I've already given you a reason... Break it off with him. Trust me, no guy wants to see their girl doing the shit you did with me." He steps close and brings his hands up to my chin, feeling my skin with his thumb. I push him away with all the energy I have.

He laughs at my failed attempt. "You'll be doing him a favor. You don't wanna ruin his life too, do you?"

He doesn't wait for an answer before he leaves. How did I ruin his life? He was the one ruining mine, just when I thought I was getting somewhere with it.

Before I even make it to the steps, I vomit in my mom's flowers. I feel completely drained as I sit on the steps where Emmett had been moments ago.

I don't want to open the envelope but I do anyway. He'd promised me that he deleted everything, but I should have known he'd lied.

Just thinking about what I'd done with Emmett made me sick, but seeing the photos made me want to die.

Not even looking at two of the photos, I shove them all back into the envelope, get myself into the house, and under the shower. I thought the days of crying under the spray of the water were over, but now I knew they were only now starting.

How could I have ever been so stupid?


	11. Chapter 11

ReneeFF is my better half at this. Thank you for editing, love.

* * *

><p>Chapter 11<p>

I had cried my eyes out while I was alone but when Alice brought Mila back and my parents got home, I pretended everything was fine. I texted Jake to come over once Mila was asleep. I had to do it now and be over with it.

It's the last thing I wanted. He was perfect, not to mention the hottest guy I'd ever met, but it was time for me to understand I wasn't going to have what I wanted. The sooner I accepted that, the sooner I could try and be happy with what I did have. I had a family and a daughter that loved me, not everyone was so lucky.

I could hardly look at Jake when I got into his car that night. I felt like I was shaking.

He kissed my cheek, "You're shivering, babe, you okay? Here, I'll turn the heat up."

I shook my head. "I'm not cold."

"Alright, should we go somewhere? You hungry?"

I shook my head again and finally turned to him. He couldn't find out all that stuff about me. I didn't want to do this, but I had to act like I did.

"Jake... You're really great…" My voice gave me away.

"You're kidding me, right?"

"What?"

"That's the beginning of a break up speech."

I sighed and gave him a sad look. "I just think... all that's going on with me is too much."

"But you know I'm here to help you."

"Jake... don't make this harder." I tried really hard to stay strong and not show him how much this hurt. It's the last thing I want, especially considering he makes me feel safer than anyone. I have Alice and Jason, and they're amazing, but Jake's different. He's perfect.

"I just don't fucking get it, Rose... I know you're going through stuff but I really thought I was helping you."

"Jake..." I can't help it, I'm crying.

He takes my hands but I pull away. I have to do it. I hate it and I hate Emmett but I can't do anything about it.

"Tell me what this is really about."

I look at him through the dim light and it reminds me of our first date, the street lights illuminating his features. I wish I didn't play hard to get at the beginning so I could have had more time with him. Just another thing to add onto my long list of mistakes.

I couldn't risk Jake seeing those photos, and God forbid the videos. It would ruin everything he saw in me. He would question why I wasn't having sex with him and see that I'm the biggest hypocrite that ever existed.

I was such an idiot for letting Emmett talk me into it all. I hated him with everything that I was for coming back to ruin my life yet again. I really had no one to blame but myself though. I was in love with him and I did everything he wanted to make him happy.

"You can't want me for a girlfriend."

"What do you mean, I'm with you aren't I? I wouldn't be if I didn't want to. I don't do shit I don't want to do."

"I have a kid, I'm a teenager... I'm dealing with my ex... You deserve a girl who's going to give all her attention to you... I have nothing to give, I'm sorry."

"You have_ you_ to give. I love Mila, and this is a fucking shitty way of telling you, but I love you too..."

I sob then and shake my head. I don't want to hear it. I can't hear it.

"We've been dating for awhile, and we hardly get to do what couples do, and it's because of me... You don't deserve to have a girlfriend with this many problems... who won't even sleep with you." Before everything got messed up, I really wanted to.

"You think I pretend to care about you just because I want to fuck you? Sure, I'd love to sleep with you, but I know that's not all life has to offer. The people I care about are more important than whether I get laid or not."

"I want you to have someone without problems, who's going to give you everything... I'm not only talking about sex. I hardly do anything for you. I'm sorry I just can't do it, it's too hard being with you."

"Being with me shouldn't be hard..." He shakes his head. "Besides, I think I got my answer when you didn't say you loved me back... I don't need someone that'll only pay attention to me, I need someone who's gonna love me."

I swallow the hugest lump down my throat. I want to tell him I love him and hug him so badly, but this is the only way it'll be over.

"I'm sorry... I have to go." I push his car door open. I want him to stop me and tell me that whatever it was it wouldn't matter to him.

He doesn't though, and it's for the best. I want him. I want to be with him, and be everything he needs. Although the reason I'm breaking up with him is because of Emmett, all those things I said were true, and I really did realize how selfish I'd been. He gave everything in this relationship and I hardly gave anything in return.


	12. Chapter 12

I adore Alice in this fic, and it's just so easy writing as her, I wanted to do it a little because it came to me.

Thank you to ReneeFF for her editing.

* * *

><p>Alice POV<p>

I push Mila's hair aside as we have our picnic outside in the rare sunshine.

"What are you girls doing?" I hear Jasper and look over to the back deck.

"Soaking in the sun. Come join us."

I smile at my husband as he comes over. I decide to enjoy these few seconds, knowing we're going to have a fight any second. It would start with what he was about to say.

He kisses Mila sweetly and sits behind her, leaning in to kiss me above her head.

"Where's Rose?"

I sigh. I knew it. "She's having a rough day. I offered to take Mila."

"She and Jake are out again, aren't they?"

I give him a blank stare.

"Of course I'm right, why'd I even ask?"

"No, they're not. They broke up and I think she just needs a little time alone."

"Told you it was only a matter of weeks."

"They've been together for longer than a few weeks, Jazz. Come on, don't do this. Jake was good for her. She was happy."

He just sighs and looks at me. He knows how I feel and I know how he feels. He's just wrong that's all.

"I was thinking they could stay with us for a few days. I think she just needs some time away from your parents."

He laughs with a sort of bitter amusement. "You know what she's been putting them through, right? They're the one's that need a break."

I sigh loudly and look at him for a minute, ignoring that he just said that.

"You know how your parents are with her. Why can't they stay here?" Jasper and I have had this conversation so many times, and I keep wishing he'd have a change of heart. I think Rose would be happier here with us.

Jasper's an amazing person with a big heart, and sometimes I don't understand why he's so hell-bent on keeping it a secret. I've seen him with Mila when Rose isn't around, and it's the complete opposite to when she is. He wants her to think he's disappointed in her, which I know she's already figured out.

"She chose her path, Alice; she has to do it on her own."

"Just because she has this path doesn't mean she has to do it alone. Family help each other out."

He looks at me for awhile, and I know his silence is even worse than us arguing. "I'm done having this conversation with you on a weekly basis. We help as much as we can."

We could help more. I wish everyone wasn't so hard on her. She's such a good person and she tries so hard not to show that she's hurting. I see right through her smile though. I just want someone to put a real one on her face, and Jake was, for a little while.

She won't tell me what happened which makes me know it's bad. Rose and I tell each other everything. At least I thought we did.

I focus my attention back to Mila and smile so she knows nothing is wrong.

Jasper gets up and leaves us alone again without another word.


	13. Chapter 13

Thank you, my darling ReneeFF for the edit.

* * *

><p>Chapter 13<p>

I spend a huge part of the day crying under my covers. When Mom yells at me and gives her I-told-you-so speech, it only makes me feel worse. I just want to be left alone. I call out of work because I just can't deal with it right now. I'd only called out once before so they don't seem to mind.

Dad's pissed off at me about it though. Unable to stand being in the house anymore, I pull some sweats on and walk over to Alice and Jasper's.

Jason texts me to make sure I'm okay and I just text back that I'm not feeling well and I'll see him at work tomorrow.

I walk around to the side of the house to enter through the kitchen, sniffling and trying to compose myself. I know Alice will be her beyond amazing self when I get in there and her kindness will only make me sadder.

I stop when I hear Jasper's raised voice inside. Alice's voice isn't as loud, but I can hear her as well. It isn't the first time I've heard them fight. It sucks. I was afraid he'd get angry at her for taking Mila again. I missed being little, remembering what a sweet big brother he used to be. He'd always look after me and make sure I didn't get hurt.

I didn't want to listen but it sounded like he was mad at her for not being all that she should be. She yelled back that she did everything for him that a wife should, while also being a successful career woman. She didn't know what else he wanted.

When they stopped, I looked through the window just in time to see her kissing him. I feel a sharp pain in my chest when he grabs her shoulders and pushes her away, saying he doesn't want to look at her right now.

I step back again and bite my lip. Seconds later, Jasper swings the back door open. He's just as surprised as I am, then sighs, looks at me like he hates me, then gets into his truck.

Pushing my feelings away I quickly go inside. Alice is crying by the sink, so I go over to hug her. She cries into my shoulder for awhile. I rub her back and tell her it'll be okay. I am so sorry.

She calms down enough to tell me Mila is upstairs sleeping and had been a joy today. I nod and thank her, getting her to sit down as I make us tea.

It was always odd seeing Alice sad, I was so used to her happy.

"Are you okay?" I ask.

Her head is in her hands as she shakes it.

"Why won't you tell me what happened with Jake?"

I sigh as I sit down. "It's too complicated." My heart is breaking.

"Life's complicated, Rose... don't you see?"

I nod. I did see. I knew too well.

"He told me he loves me." I begin.

She looks at me, interested, while still sniffling and red-eyed from crying.

"I couldn't say it back. I can't keep doing this to him. I thought my life was messed up when I met him, but now things are so much worse than I ever thought they could be. Everyone's right, I can't be someone's girlfriend. I have nothing to give him... I couldn't even sleep with him... And I really wanted to... I wanted to tell him I loved him, but it isn't fair to keep doing this to him." It all spills out a little easier now. Well, not _all _of it, but she does deserve an explanation. I don't want to tell her about the pictures and video as much as I don't want to tell Jake. It's embarrassing and I'm ashamed.

She looks into her tea and sighs. "I know people say relationships are equal, but they're not; one person is always going to give more... and that's not a bad thing – people's lives are just different. I saw him with you; he wanted to be with you. You really think it's fair you made that decision for him? You may have been everything he wanted when he thought of his perfect partner... You took that away from him... And yourself. I can tell he's meant for you. You were finally happy with someone other than Mila."

"I'm happy with you," I smile with tears in my eyes.

"I know, but it's different... You know what I'm talking about... I've never said this to you before because I would never have meant it... but this time, you made a mistake, Rose."

I don't say anything, warming my hands on the hot mug. I know Jake's the one, but I want him to see me the way he sees me now,; it'll all change if he finds out how I used to be.


	14. Chapter 14

Thank you, ReneeFF for being a sweetheart, mwa!

* * *

><p>Chapter 14<p>

I've been staring at Jake's number in my phone for over an hour now. I miss him so damn much that it hurts to breathe. I can live without a lot and I've learned to, but I wish he didn't have to be one of them. He's the one thing I want to fight for. He's the one thing I wish no one else had a say in.

I push the text option and quickly type out,_ Are you asleep?_

I bite my lip and glance over at Mila's bed to make sure she's okay. She's sleeping peacefully.

_Yes._ He replies.

My throat hurts. I don't know what I was expecting him to say, but I know it's something more. There's so much I want to tell him, but I can't.

I set my phone down and sigh, closing my eyes and hoping sleep would just set in already. I hear my phone vibrate and almost knock it to the floor as I grab it.

_Why?_

_Please don't hate me?_ I text back. I can't deal with him hating me. Not when I love him so much.

_I don't. What's wrong, Rose?_

I sniffle and take a shaky breathe. What's not wrong?

_Everything's my fault. I'm sorry I hurt you._

_What happened?_

_Nothing_. I chicken out. _I just want you to know I'm sorry I hurt you._

That's the last conversation I have with him before he moves to the city for school.

* * *

><p>Emmett's got visitation rights on the weekends, without supervision. All I do is worry when she's with him and feel like my chest is going to collapse in on itself. When he drops her off I can not hold her enough.<p>

I see her with him though, and I can tell she loves him. She's so comfortable and calls him Daddy like he's always been there.

We hardly talk, but he asks to speak to me one afternoon as Bella takes Mila to their car.

I cross my arms and look at him, he makes my blood boil.

"I know you're worried, I just want you to know you don't have to be. I love being her dad and I'd never do anything to hurt her."

I have no choice but to believe him. There isn't anything I can do. I just nod.

"I know I'm jerk to you, but I won't ever be to her."

I won't ever let him see me cry again. "I gotta get to work." I tell him.

He nods and smiles before he leaves.

I don't know how I do this, but I do. I'd do anything for her.

That night when I come home from work, Jasper's on the couch. I frown. There isn't a game on or anything, and Dad's asleep. He notices me.

"Hey," I say gently, stepping into the living room.

"Hey."

"What are you doing here?"

He looks at the television as he answers. "Had a fight with your sister-in-law."

"Is she okay?"

He smiles and looks at me, "I guess... I'm okay, thanks for asking."

I roll my eyes. Thankfully he hardly looks at me so he doesn't notice.

"You want me to make you something?" I ask. "You hungry?"

"No, I don't feel like eating dinner."

I take a deep breath, about to leave and go upstairs.

"Haven't had breakfast for dinner in a long time though."

I smile. I love breakfast for dinner, but I don't really eat mine. Instead I enjoy watching Jasper. He's always liked my cooking.

"We used to do this before you had Mila."

"I remember." I smile, feeling nostalgic. "I used to love it."

I think he's about to say he did too, but he stays quiet.

"You'll be okay, you know? Alice loves you more than anything. And... everyone fights, doesn't mean you hate each other."

"I know... We just need some time apart..."

I know he doesn't. I know how much he needs her. She is what makes him whole.

"You'll be okay too. Don't worry so much about Emmett... I actually think he might be good with Mila... Also, he can take some of the pressure of being a parent away from you... You have someone now who'll care and worry about her as much as you do."

I'm having a nice moment with him, so I don't argue.

* * *

><p>Thankfully Jasper's back home within a few days. And the next time I see them together, they're practically all over one another. It reminds me of when they started dating. It's kind of gross but I'm happy they're happy.<p>

Alice tries explaining that they were just frustrated with each other but now that they've decided to talk more and have everything out in the open, it's going okay.

Maybe it's that they're not taking care of Mila as much now that Emmett's in the picture. They have more time to be a couple.

It's date night. Mom and Dad are out, so are Jasper and Alice, even Jason's with a new guy. Mila and I watch cartoons and relax on the couch.

I watch her and smile to myself because she is such a happy little girl.

The only thing that would make this moment beyond perfect would be Jake. I wonder what he's doing, and hope he's okay. There isn't a day that I don't miss him.


	15. Chapter 15

Thank you to my friend Cydney for all her help and awesomeness.

* * *

><p>Chapter 15<p>

Four Months Later...

I smile as I step off the bus. Today is my day, I can feel it. I'm scared and nervous but I'm finally doing what I've wanted since the minute Jake left.

Alice convinced me. She told me to listen to my heart and do what it wanted. It wanted Jake. I wanted to tell him the truth and hoped he would understand.

I'd been on the train for hours and taken the bus to the nearest stop I could to Jake's apartment.

I walk the rest of the way and smile at the door man when he lets me in.

He enters the building with me. "How can I help you, miss?"

"I'm here to see Jacob Black. Uh, it's kind of a surprise and he doesn't know I'm here."

"I'm sorry I can't let you up without his permission. He came home a little while ago. Would you mind if I call up and tell him you're down here?"

"Okay, that's good. Thank you. My name is Rose." I've been so nervous all day - all week, really. Now that I'm here I'm just so ready to see him. Tell him I'm sorry and beg for this weekend to be ours. I'm going to tell him everything, and if he doesn't want anything to do with me, at least I'll have tried. I'm not going to let anyone hold me back anymore. How could I let Emmett have that power over me?

I listen to the man make the call and wait anxiously as he talks to Jake. He doesn't say much before hanging up. I smile, waiting for him to tell me the way up.

"I'm sorry, miss, he doesn't want any visitors right now."

I frown and my heart drops. I've never been here and I'm far from home. For some reason I didn't think he'd just dismiss me.

"But, I traveled a long way."

"I can tell you where some nearby hotels are if you'd like to get a room for the night and get some rest... I'm sorry." He says again.

I stand there speechless for a moment, and then look around. I spot sofas in the lobby. "May I sit?"

He gives me a sad smile and nods. I bring my bag with me and sit there in a trance.

I pull my phone out of my bag finally and debate texting him. I do it.

_I'm down stairs, please let me up? _

I wait and he answers eight minutes later.

_You shouldn't have come. It's over, Rose. Don't drag it on._

I sit here like this for far too long. The door man asks me to leave. I can tell he's sorry for it.

"I will; can I just have another minute?"

He nods and goes to the desk he was at before.

_Please, Jake? I came all this way. _

I missed him so much and it hurts deeply. I guess he was only giving me what I'd given him: Rejection.

The phone in the lobby rings and soon after, the man comes over to me. "I'll take you up, miss."

I thank him and he helps me with my bag as he takes me up to Jake's floor and shows me the door.

When Jake opens the door I all but jump on him. I've thrown my arms around his neck and am holding on tight. I'm so emotionally drained and he's the only person who can fix me.

He never hasn't hugged me before. He takes my arms and gently pulls me off of himself.

"What are you doing, Rose?"

"I'm trying to win you back." I smile. "I'm sorry for everything before. Hear me out?"

He lets me in, taking my bag and putting it in the living room.

His apartment is beyond amazing. I comment on it, nervously. I'm just so happy to see him. He looks even better than I remember.

"This is nice."

"It's my mom's." He hands me a bottle of water and doesn't say anything else, putting his hands into his pockets.

"I guess I should just get right to the point... I'm sorry it took me so long."

He shrugs. "I didn't expect you to come, so there's nothing to apologize for."

"I should have told you that... I love you..."

I sit because my legs are weak. He stays standing. It makes me even more nervous but I'm not going to tell him what to do. And when he doesn't say it back, I accept it.

"I do... I never wanted to break up with you... Emmett made me."

"What? Do you know how crazy that sounds? How the hell can your ex do that?" He's a cold version of himself. I'm not used to angry, distant Jake. I'm used to loving and comforting Jake.

"When we were together, I kinda... I let him... tape us... a few times... He told me he'd show you if I didn't break up with you."

"Taped you having sex?"

I nod. I feel so disgusted in myself. "I was an idiot... But I did everything he wanted because I loved him... I was afraid because I didn't want you to know I used to be that way... When you used to look at me, I felt so good. Nobody saw me the way you did."

He didn't look at me the same this time, and I realized it was over. I realized it before he even told me.

"I did love you... but you're right, being with you was too hard... I don't want it anymore... I'm sorry you came all this way just to hear that... I think it would be better if we just live our own lives... I'll get you a hotel room." He goes for the phone.

I'm up before he can dial. "It's okay, I can find one..."

"I'm not the answer, Rose... You'll be okay without me. You're stronger than you think."

Suddenly I notice my cheeks are wet. "I know." I lie. "Thanks for hearing me out."

He sees me to the door and when I come downstairs, the doorman tells me he's called me a cab and it was paid for. I get dropped off at the train station.

On my way home, I delete all our texts, pictures, and his number.

It's time to move on, for good.


	16. Chapter 16

Thank you, Cydney, my love

* * *

><p>Chapter 16<p>

Three Years Later

"Mummy!" Mila yells as she runs over to me from Emmett.

I hug at her and we both wave at him. He blows her a kiss and smiles as he waves back.

"Did you have fun with Daddy?"

I'm happy to hear she had a great time. The two of them always do. He's actually a good father, as much as I hate to admit it.

We walk to our apartment, where I make us dinner. I've already done all my homework so when the dishes are done, all that's left is to relax on the couch. Thankfully Mila feels like doing the same thing. We snuggle up and watch cartoons.

With Emmett's help, I have time for college and work. I'm busy almost every day, but things are good. A friend of Jason's mom was looking for someone to help at her flower shop and I'd taken on a full time job there. I actually love working with the flowers and I'd quickly learned all about them. I can now afford a small one bedroom apartment.

Mila has the bedroom, which Alice decorated. I have a closet and the sofa doubles as my bed. I actually love it, no one can tell me what to do here and I feel free.

In the morning I get Mila and myself ready for school and I walk her over there.

"Bella will pick you up and I'll see you later tonight." I wink at her.

She gives me a really good hug. "Can't wait."

"Me too."

I wait until she's out of sight and hurry into town. I set up and open the florist, getting to the orders. I'm here alone most days. The owner trained me to know how to deal with everything. She wanted to spend more time at home and only comes in a few times a week.

My first customer is a man about my age, buying roses for his girlfriend. He tells me it's their one year anniversary and he's taking her out tonight to a really special dinner. One thing that isn't so great about this job is just this; people who are in love receive flowers.

I remember the flowers that Jake got me and the love I felt with him. I try to put that love into every arrangement I make. There hasn't been anyone since, and I'm okay with that. My family were right; I had a lot more important things to concentrate on. Maybe love would find me again and hopefully I won't screw it up. I don't know if I'll be so lucky, but I haven't lost hope.

For lunch Alice drops by. She's eight months pregnant and has suddenly become a food expert. She's even more beautiful and radiant now that she's about to become a mother. And Jasper's happier than I've ever seen him.

They asked me to be the godmother. Being an aunt was exciting enough, but a godmother was a whole other level for me. Alice has always thought I was a great mother, but the fact that Jasper wanted it too was what really made me happy. Having my family be proud of me again meant everything.

I made Alice up a bouquet before she went home and continued working for the rest of the day.

An hour before closing, the door bell rings and I swear I'm seeing things when Jake is the person who enters the store.

He looked the same, more handsome if possible. It's as though my hearts expanded and my chest is tight.

He smiles brightly. "Hey, Rose."

I go over to him quickly for a hug, with he gives back willingly, holding me tighter and longer than I expect. He holds my shoulders as he looks me over. "How are you? You look even more beautiful than the last time I saw you."

When I smile I noticed I haven't smiled that way in a long time. I don't have high hopes, so I try to squish the feeling in my chest down. But I can't believe he's here.

"I'm really good." I say in a daze. "Are you visiting your family?"

"Yeah, I'm gonna stay awhile." He nods. "I ran into Jason at the supermarket, he said you're working here."

"Oh, when'd you see him?"

"About ten minutes ago." He shrugs sheepishly. "I just wanted to see you."

"Well, I'm glad you're here. How is everything?"

"Everything is good... Would you want to catch up over dinner? I don't want to keep you from your work."

I'm saying yes before I even think about it, a bit too eagerly. I'm confused though, I didn't think he'd want this again. I quickly realize it's not a date like I hope; he just wants to have dinner.

"Can you do tonight?"

"I have to see if Emmett and Bella can take Mila. If they can then yes."

He gives me his number. I tell him I'll call him either way.

"I'm looking forward to it. I'll leave you to work."

I don't want him to, but I nod anyway. Hopefully I'd see him again tonight.


	17. Chapter 17

Thank you to Cydney as always

* * *

><p>Chapter 17<p>

I am so full of energy that I don't know what to do with myself. I'm also super nervous. I call Alice to tell her right away, and she says she'll be at my place in a few hours.

Then I call Bella to ask if they'll take Mila for the night, which I know they gladly will. She's about to become Mila's stepmom and is good at it. In a way I hate how great they are with Mila and how much Mila loves them, but more than I hate it, I'm grateful, because my child has so many people who care for her as much as I do.

When I have the okay, I give Jake a call. My heart is beating out of my chest; even more so when I hear how happy he seems to be seeing me. He says we'll go to this Italian restaurant a friend of his recommended. He'll pick me up at seven.

It doesn't give me much time to get ready, but Alice is here and she has me ready in no time. She's big and moves slower than usual but she's still better at this than I am. She makes me feel pretty and I love her.

When Jake knocks on the door, Alice answers too eagerly.

"Alice, wow, you look..."

"Pregnant!" she answers with a laugh.

They hug each other hello and he smiles at me over her shoulder when we make eye contact. The pink rose in his hand makes me smile wider.

"Well, we'll catch up." Alice tells him. "I've got to get home and you two have dinner to get to." She winks back at me and wishes us a goodnight.

Jake steps inside when Alice is gone and he hands me the flower. "You look beautiful. Are you ready to go?"

"Yes, let me just put this in some water." I smell it as I walk over to the kitchen. It's the most stunning rose I've ever seen, and that's saying something.

I don't think this is a date, but a rose definitely feels like a date. I feel good about it.

"The apartment's nice. You like being out of your parents house?"

I give him a look and he laughs. "Definitely. I finally feel like I can breathe... Things are a lot better with my parents now that we're not under the same roof."

I fill him in on my family on our way to the restaurant and he gives me an update on his mom, her husband and his dad. Everyone seems like they're in a good place. It's nice to hear.

* * *

><p>The restaurant is lovely. I'm glad I didn't over or underdress. Being here with him is perfect, like I'm finally where I should be.<p>

Conversation is light while we choose what we want to eat and drink, and slowly begins to get deeper as time goes on.

"Tell me something I don't know." He asks.

I think for a second, "I'm in school."

His expression is happy. "Studying?"

"Business." I make a face at his changed reaction.

"Don't tell me you gave up on acting?"

I shrug. "It was just a dream I used to have. It's okay; I like what I'm doing now. I feel more grounded. I feel secure… It's taken me a long time to be happy with myself." I don't want him to be disappointed. I need him to know these were my decisions and I'm fine with them. I like myself, finally.

"As long as no one is holding you back. It's okay that you changed your mind, we find new dreams along the way, right?"

I nod and smile. "I don't think anyone ends up exactly where they thought they would; doesn't mean it's a bad thing."

By the end of our bottle of wine he reaches across the table for my hand. I hold his happily. It all feels like a dream. It makes me a little unsure of myself, but having him across from me is one of the biggest things I could ask for.

"I was an idiot, Rose." He looks at our hands as he talks.

I frown, hearing that he sounds so sad.

"You came all the way to see me and you told everything, even though I know it was hard and… I didn't really hear you out. I was angry with you… I've been regretting it for a long time. I need you to know I'm sorry I didn't give you a chance. I was a jerk for saying that being with you was too hard; I didn't mean it. Being with you was the best time of my life."

"Jake, it's okay. I had enough chances with you, and I didn't blame you once for the way things ended. It wasn't your fault. You were always amazing; my life was just too complicated. Trust me, I know."

He shook his head and frowned his brow. "You were worth the complication… I just didn't realize and I'm afraid I missed my shot with you… I waited too long."

It's as though he's asking a question. I want to scream that it wasn't, but the waiter interrupts the whole conversation.

Jake clears his throat and hands him a credit card, asking if I'm done as he does so.

I nod and sit back, putting my now free hands into my lap.

"I'm sorry, I don't expect to just come back and have everything I want… I certainly didn't give that to you last time."

I'm confused. Is he talking about wanting me?

I decide then and there to just go for it, and as soon as we're in the parking lot, I lean into him and press my lips to his.

He's frozen for a second and I'm about to apologize right before he pushes me into his car and kisses me harder. I smile into the kiss and hug him.

I know this time it's right, there's no one and nothing in the way. We're free.

Clothes are flying off of us back at my apartment, and I'm so happy I laugh. He smiles at me before kissing my neck and holding me against a wall. "I love that laugh."

I want to feel him through every inch of my body, and when my first orgasm washes through me, I do feel him. We're both naked, in the middle of my living room floor, a layer of sweat covering our skin as our bodies move together.

I love him so much - I always have - and I finally feel the closeness I've always yearned for with him.

He joins me in his own orgasm and pulls me on top of him before relaxing completely onto the floor. I kiss his chest and snuggle close, enjoying every second.

I imagined this night countless times, but this was different and _so_ much better.

He lifts his arm onto my back, gathers my hair, and pulls it to one side.

I moan in complete satisfaction. "So that's what I've been missing?"

His chest moves in a small chuckle. "You never have to miss it again if that's what you want."

I look up into his dark eyes, hoping he's serious. "Really?"

"I told you, I came back because I realized I didn't fight for you like I should have."

"No you didn't." I smiled. "Not in those words."

"I'm sorry, babe, I should have never let you leave that night… Tell me it's not too late."

"It's the perfect time, Jake… Just stay?" We kiss then, and I know my life will finally be complete.


	18. Chapter 18

I'm sure it won't be the last time I'm thanking Cydney, but it is for this story. Lucky to have a friend in you.

* * *

><p>Ten months later<p>

Jasper hugs me into his side and kisses the top of my head. I smile really wide and watch our family in Mom and Dad's backyard. Shane was christened today at the church. Alice and Jasper only wanted family so I was surprised when they invited Jake.

"Thank you for inviting Jake, it really means a lot." He and Mila are the loves of my life.

"Thank _you_ for being Shane's godmother."

"It's one of the things I'm proudest of." I beam. He is the happiest, sweetest baby boy in the world. It's no surprise with who his parents are.

"Well," he sighs, going back to talking about Jake. "Jake will be family sooner or later, right?" It's as though he doesn't want to say it, but he does anyway.

I smiled up at him and hug him tighter. "I hope so." He was already my family.

"I know you love him, and I see he makes you happy… I suck for not seeing it before."

"No, you don't. I could never ask for a better brother. You've never sucked." Even when he was angry and disappointed in me, he was still my big brother. No one else was better for the role.

He laughs. "You've never been a good liar."

Mom calls us to come eat.

I sit next to Jake, who has Mila in his lap, and look around at my family. Life is magical.

THE END


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